I absolutely abhor the phrase “Perception is everything”.
It seems like it gives people carte blanche to make judgments on people and situations based solely on what they think. These judgments are at best an educated guess and at worst a pure assumption completely devoid of reason. I was fully committed to the “people don’t know the real me” team; however, I read a post the other week that inspired some further thought.
The post essentially argued that while we may justify to ourselves that people’s opinion of us doesn’t matter because “they don’t know the real me”, in many ways their opinion does matter. If you only show one side of yourself to people then guess what, that is the way they know you. That’s the version of you that exists in the world and you don’t get to say it’s not real.
If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, then it’s a duck. It doesn’t matter if that duck thinks it’s a swan.
For instance, if you’re mean to everyone that you encounter, then some portion of you is mean. You don’t get to qualify the behavior by saying “I’m actually really nice on the inside” or “I have a good heart”. Now, I’m not saying that you are what the world says you are. That is a stark lie. However, I am saying that perhaps another you exists that you’re not completely aware of. There’s something we study in psychology called the “Johari Window” that helps visually explain this concept.
It’s almost like there are 4 different facets of ourselves and it’s our job to reconcile all these facets to be the best possible version that we can be.
The easiest thing to consider is what’s “open”, what you know about yourself and what the world knows about you. It’s surface level. You may know that you’re really funny and outgoing and everyone knows you as the life of the party. This is the aspect of your personality that you knowingly show the world and what everyone sees.
Next, there’s that “hidden” facet, that part of ourselves that we protect. Essentially, it’s our innermost being that rarely sees the light of day. We don’t let others see it but it’s the core of who we are. This is typically what we consider our “real” selves. In many ways, that belief is valid, after all, who knows you better than you? I’m just arguing that maybe it’s not the end-all, be all.
Hence, there are some tougher things to contend with. “Your blind spot”, what does the world know about you, that you don’t know about yourself? That’s where that perception thing comes in and where we can’t completely write off the things that credible (emphasis on credible) people say about us. Listen and take things in with a grain of salt.
Perhaps you are projecting something that you didn’t quite intend.
And finally, the most difficult, the “Unknown”, those things that are hidden from the world and our own consciousness. Those are the things about us that only God knows. That hidden place can only be revealed by prayer and communion with God.
I read somewhere and it forever stuck with me, “if you could see yourself as God sees you, then you would rise up and never again be the same.”
Spend some time with the Lord allowing Him to reveal to you those dark things that need to be weeded out or those hidden gems that can enrich the world. Rise up to be His vision of who you are.
We all exist on multiple planes. There are certain facets of ourselves that only some people are privy to and that’s okay. It’s even necessary. Just be aware of what you’re displaying to the world. I guess all I’m saying is…
Perception isn’t everything; however, it is something.
